TOny, who is in his 50s, recently did a quick calculation of how much time he’s spent watching porn in his life. “The results were horrifying,” he says. Eight years. “It’s hard to even think about. The frustration is intense.”
Tony saw his first “hardcore” movie on VHS in the 1980s, when he was 12 years old. It was in his 20s that he first got online, which turned his habit into a “full-blown addiction.” For the past 30 years, he’s managed to maintain a double life: he works in care, has friendships and relationships with men and women. But there’s one side of him he keeps completely secret.
“So far, I’ve only told three people about this: two therapists, and now you,” he says. “I’ve kept it a complete secret from everyone I’ve ever known. I’m very careful to cover my tracks, even in relationships. My lack of interest in sex with my partner might be the only thing that makes her wonder.”
Tony has tried many times to stop watching porn but has never been able to go more than a month without it. He’s tried cutting down, banned masturbation, blocked porn sites, and tried to quit completely. But “the addict’s brain is very cunning and manipulative,” he says. He also tried therapy, but found it difficult to keep up with the costs long-term.
Still, Tony is grateful for one thing: he was young before the internet. “At least I had a normal youth. Parties, shows, adventures with friends. I had a girlfriend. I had a sex life. A guy like me doesn’t have that chance now.”
All statistics on pornography use in the UK and globally have skyrocketed due to the widespread use of mobile phones: in May 2023 alone, around 13.8 million people, a third of all internet-using adults, viewed pornography online.
According to Ofcom
Of these, two-thirds were male. Although pornography companies do not report (or acknowledge) statistics on underage viewers, on average, children in the UK first see pornography at age 12. In a recent study, the Children’s Commissioner for England said:
Much of what young people see is violent and extreme.
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Source: www.theguardian.com