Hold on

Reader Simon Leech responded cheerfully to Feedback magazine’s call for papers that “the title tells you all you need to know” by saying, “Well, that’s what you wanted!”

“That” is, British Medical Journal In 1980 “Penis injury caused by vacuum cleaner”.

“The title says it all you need to know,” says Leach, “but the report also answers every question you could possibly imagine. The final sentence sums it up: ‘The present patient may have thought his penis would not hit the fan, but the freshness of the experience drove him to disastrous results.'” Leach adds: “As junior doctors, we BMJ I think you should try harder, we are all reading this!”

Feedback argues that, whether professional or personal, we should love our vacuum cleaners wisely, but not too much. If you know of another research paper with a title as satisfying as this, please send it to Telltale titles, c/o Feedback.

How to Remove a Cyst

Shiheng Zhao and Pierre Haas grab the reader’s attention with the title of their study. “The mechanism of puncturing the cyst”Once that’s done, they change to a less civilised tone.

Chao and Haas, from two of the three Max Planck Institutes in Dresden, Germany, demonstrate a way of running a discussion that minimizes the unpleasant parts and maximizes the technical parts.

“Similar to poking fruit samples in the supermarket to assess their edibility, indenting biological samples reveals mechanical properties that are intrinsically related to their biological function,” they write.

After that, “Pushing force and debt And the displacement e “Deformation characteristics of the indenter” and “Calculation of the elastic deformation gradient”

If you have an interesting skin condition but your friends hate you for telling them about it, try using Zhao and Haas’s elegant phraseology: A cyst, they point out, is simply “a spherical monolayer of polarized cells surrounding a fluid-filled lumen.”

Meat burger

Hundreds of Hamburgers in the city of Hamburg, Germany, answered a survey about three different types of sausages. They were selected Hamburgers, all of whom belonged to a certain age group.

The senders of the survey, Stephan GH Meyerding and Magdalena Cooper from the University of Applied Sciences Hamburg, limited the questions to types of sausage: “meat, plant-based or in vitro salami.”

Of the three types of salami, meat-based is the most traditional, but plant-based versions have also grown in popularity over the past few decades, with test-tube salami made using stem cells being the newest, and still making its way from the lab to the dinner table.

What is the researcher’s goal? “Explaining food choices of German Generations Y and Z through core dimensions of meat-eating habits scale.”.

Judging from their data, the conclusion seems clear: “A majority of German Gen Y and Gen Z members prefer vegan meat to real meat, and cultured meat is more popular than beef and pork.”

The verdict seems less convincing than if new studies had been conducted a few years later: “Cultured meat is still unknown and not yet available on the German market,” the researchers say.

Eat the liver

New evidence supports the age-old complaint that children don’t want to listen to adults. “Kids don’t want to eat what they should be eating…” According to the title of Villa Reka Nickel’s study on child nutrition.

Nickel is based at the Institute of Ethnology in Budapest and has been researching the history of “Public Meals for Hungarian Children”.

During that time, the country’s eating habits and food preparation practices changed dramatically, due to “the obligation to provide public meals and general work obligations”, the study said.

Nickel illustrates their problem with hate using photos, one of which is captioned, “Fried breaded luncheon meat and creamed split peas are one of the school lunch ‘staples,’ but they were never the most popular school lunch.”

There are certain meals that many children are reluctant to eat, and Nikel has investigated this harassment in detail: “In our research, fried liver was one such meal. In Eger, they dealt with this problem by serving only rice if the child did not want liver. In Özd, children were not given this option. When I asked about the possibility of serving children as much food as they wanted, the food service manager in Özd drew my attention to an important fact: ‘It’s illegal. Parents pay for it.'”

Statistics and Baboons

“Can non-human primates perform linear regression on graphs?” ask Lorenzo Ciccione and his colleagues in their study “Baboons as statisticians.” Their tentative answer is that, to some extent, they can, but the extent to which they can “depends on the individual.”

Marc Abrahams is the founder of the Ig Nobel Prize ceremony and co-founder of the journal Annals of Improbable Research. He previously worked on unusual uses of computers. His website is Impossible.

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